Items worth Counselor’s attention:  Unexpected but True Facts


The word ‘Homosexual’ is condemned by the Gay and Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation (GLAAD) as a ‘Term to avoid’... (In the past) It was widely used as a medical term...when we were targeted by many different organizations.  Doctors, researchers, even the CIA, considered us a form of ‘sexual deviancy.’   We were subjected to mass surveillance, blackmail, police raids, chemical castration, electroshock therapy and other unnecessary medical experiments that attempted to ‘correct us’. 

“We weren’t a people: we were ‘suffering from a condition, homosexuality, which needs to be ‘fixed.’  While some of the more extreme practices have fortunately disappeared, the horrendous torture continues in many places today in the form of ‘gay conversion therapy’ [illegal in WA. State] sometimes even on our youth...”  [From a letter the editor, Renton, WA. Paper.]

Other offensive terms include: "homosexual relations/relationship," "homosexual couple," "homosexual sex," etc.  Preferred is: "relationship," "couple" (or, if necessary, "gay couple"), "sex," etc.     [For an explanation see: ]



More than 40 million people in (America) are caregivers for family members.  The job often comes without warning or training and leaves little time for self-care.  That puts caregivers at risk for a host of physical, mental, and emotional problems. 

“’Stress is one of the biggest problems.  But I also see caregivers who are struggling with declining health because they just don’t exercise or go to the doctor,’ says Dr. Suzanne Salamon, Associate Chief of gerontology at Harvard-affiliated Beth Israel Deaconess Medical Center.”

Caregivers can find a “wealth on information” on the internet such as the Harvard Special Health Report, Caregiver’s Handbook. (  Also see (
 [Harvard Health Letter, Harvard Medical School, Volume 44, Number 10]



According to the “National Epidemiologic  Survey on Alcohol and Related Conditions”, people with serious mental disorder are 3.6 time more likely to exhibit violent behavior, but they are far more likely to be the victims of violence—with a 23 times higher risk compared with the general population.  The large majority of people with mental disorders do not engage in violence against others, and most violent behavior is due to factors other than mental illness.”

 A 2018 FBI study found that shooters typically experienced several stressors in the year before they attack—financial pressure, fight with classmates or co-workers, and substance abuse.  And on the average, shooters displayed four to five concerning behaviors that those around them could notice—the most frequent being behavior related to mental health, interpersonal conflicts or some sign of violent intent.



What happened to the “middle child”?

“According to a study by the Pew Research Center, in 1976, 65 percent of mothers between ages 40 and 44 had three or more children.  Today, nearly two thirds of women with children have only one or two.  Middle children, the most populous birth-order demographic throughout most of history, will soon be the tiniest.” (Remember “the five middle kids between the oldest and youngest in a family of seven.”

“...Middle children are natural mediators...avoid conflict and habitually act at the family peacemaker.  Middle children tend to be private but also starved for affection...According to studies, middles traditionally receive less financial and emotional support from their parents.  They also typically have less intimate relationships with their mothers and fathers compared with other siblings, so they tend to have more friends, presumably in compensation.”          

“...In a study conducted by the City College of New York in which participants were asked to choose word they associate with first, last, and middle kids, positive attributes such caring and ambitious were cited in reference to all three birth orders.   Only middles, however, were described with such negative terms as overlooked and confused.   More significantly, middles were the only birth order to which no one applied the term spoiled.  Middles may be many things, but they are not overindulged.”

“...Birth order...helps explain—along with genetics—why sibling can be so different from one another.  After all, siblings are generally exposed to the same developmental conditions, whether parental, geographic, or economic.  The only obvious variances in sibling are gender and birth order.” [Adam Sternberg, Readers Digest, Sept.2019]

Webmaster’s note And as my wife and frequent proof-reader, reminded me, often in a family with three children—if the middle one is a different gender from the other two, the middle child becomes special—as the only girl or the only boy in the family.


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